"My father had taught me to be nice first, because you can always be mean later, but once you’ve been mean to someone, they won’t believe the nice anymore. So be nice, be nice, until it’s time to stop being nice, then destroy them."
"You don’t have a valentine on Valentine’s Day? Some people don’t have a mother on Mother’s Day or a father on Father’s Day, so shut up."
"Kissing is like drinking salted water. You drink, and your thirst increases."